Death

"My God, My God, why hast thou forsaken me?"
I have changed this prayer to my own:
My God, my God, why have I forsaken You?
That Garden of Eden decision again; the free will.
The True statement by Truth Himself, " Eat not of the
Tree..." (Unless you want to die, be alone, leave me?)

We weep at the loss, the loneliness of friend, loved one
lover, or child who go away where we cannot reach them.
One fruit of that garden: our choice.

As I write this, in 13 days, it will be the 9th anniversary of
our first grandson's birth. That Day:
The call... Cell phones rang over the land !
Our youngest daughter was in the "joys" of labor,
riding on pain and expectation 'toward the
delivery room..
We who could, ran/drove to be there in
eagerness. To be the first (well 2nd or 3rd or..)
to welcome him here, get to know him.
Eve, family, and I were in the hallway. Sitting
on the floor, leaning against the wall.
To be as close as allowed,
to share in the miracle of birth.

Then:
Serious nurses, quick efficient movements;
whispers and silence stilled our speech, erased our smiles.
Sadness, she came out of the "life" room:
she told us placenta had separated, movement has stopped forever.
.............

My girl's Labor continued, fruitless labor,
quiet tears and grief;
bearing our fist, and lost
grandson.

The nurse dressed and cleaned him, she let Eve and I hold his little self.
Eve had to kiss his tiny feet, (she always does that).

We baptized Jonah there,
and gave him back to.... God, I guess.

I visited him yesterday, where Jonah Ray sleeps.
His body is in a quiet, peaceful place; deer and birds
are comfortable there, as am I.

His soul is in Heaven, touched by our
"can't wait to meet you" prayers.

How much did God cry, when we said "NO, leave me
alone. I'll do it myself !"
All He wanted was to meet us, get to know us better,
share all He has with us.
I know He cries for missing us, and touches us with
His "can't wait to be with you" prayers too.
Love and Prayers, Rick & Eve